Lessons Learned
My parents said I was impatient and pushy, almost to the point of being ‘bossy’. They weren’t wrong, I still have these traits. My folks did help me learn to control my anger and be more tolerant. In fact, they raised me to question everything but to do so with as much respect to my fellow traveler as I possibly could. My temper however has been something I’ve battled with all my life. My father said I had an Irish ‘red-headed’ temper. He warned me not to eat black pepper as he believed it caused stress and ultimately, anger (I have yet to find a correlation between pepper and anger but I love black pepper).
It was his idea that I take equestrian lessons. It was quite a good idea as it turned out; the horses taught me more about my own attitude than any human ever could. You see, dogs and cats forgive easily (okay, more so for dogs than cats). As an example: Have you ever gotten mad and walked away, slamming the door behind you? Of course you have, we all have. I did this just the other day. I was at the end of my rope and knew that I had to get quiet and alone for a few minutes to get myself back together again. As I slammed my bedroom door I caught a glimpse of my three year old German Shepherd, Sally, who was in process of following me into the room. She picks up on my emotions very quickly and responds right away. So, when I let go of the door what I saw was her looking confused and a little worried. I didn’t look back, I slammed the door and laid on my bed until the knot in my throat loosened. When I came out of the room, there she was sitting in that very same spot all wiggling, waiting for me. It made me think of how much happier we all might be if we behaved more like our canine pals. I mean really, you can yell at your dog and walk away, but when you return, there’s your dog all wiggly, waiting to make up. *Dogs don’t hold grudges, although they can, and some would be quite justified in doing so. Dogs help keep us in the moment. They give us a reason to get up in the morning and remind us all the time that forgiveness is the true key to happiness.
Horses however, don’t always take forgiveness to the extremes that dogs do. Some are more tolerant than others, but for the most part, horses see things in black and white. I began training and riding horses around the age of 8. I took to it naturally. I was never afraid, I felt such a wonderful sense of peace and strength from these beautiful beasts. I also found out what it’s like to try to get the cooperation of a 1,200 pound animal when you’re in a ‘bad mood’. Wow can they be stubborn.
One Saturday morning I was riding a 7 year-old mare in an indoor ring and for reasons beyond my understanding at the time, I couldn’t get her to do anything I wanted. I became more and more frustrated until my instructor yelled my name and told me to smile. What? Smile? Ya, right! Not wanting to act like a know-it-all, I smiled and to my shock the mare almost instantly changed her attitude and began cooperating. Whatever I asked of her, I got. She wasn’t willing to ignore my negative energy by going along with me, she just wouldn’t respond to anger and moodiness. It was good for me to have learned these lessons and because I loved horses so much I made a conscious effort to keep my mood in check. It was a wonderful teaching experience that has been very valuable to me all these years later.
* Just a note about dogs who are made to fight, Pitbulls in particular. I think the people who have all but destroyed this particular breed’s reputation should be banned from polite society. I have had several relationships with pittbulls and each time it has been extremely rewarding and happy. These guys are lap-dog, lovers and gentle with children. The state of Oregon, where I live, is working to ban the breed statewide. I can’t tell you the last time I heard of a gun killing someone without a human trigger & dogs are, for the most part, the same way. Humans with greed and hate for motivators have made this breed feared and shunned. Shame on them. Karma…
© Kathleen Ryan-McCullough
~ About Me ~
About Me?…hmm, always a tough place to start. I hate to be boxed in, labeled and pegged. I am more than my age, marital status, occupation or religion. I have unique qualities that can’t be summed up in tiny phrases. I am more than a collection of blurbs – I continue to be work in progress.
I’ve always been impatient, stubborn and above average in charm, smarts and sarcasm. I have not left some misspent youth behind me that I need recovery from; in fact, I hope I never recover. My mother believed that you are only as old as you feel. That being said, there are days I feel like having the temper tantrum of a 4 year-old and the next day I feel the better part of a century dragging behind me.
Getting Personal:
I am of Irish and Swiss decent, although I recently discovered the Swiss connection. I have been married twice, fortunately the second time took. I have 4 adult children, 4 cats who are all sisters and one supremely beautiful 5 year-old German Shepherd. I live on an island in the middle of the Columbia River.
Life here on Hayden Island can be quite noisy. We are in the glide-path for Portland Int. Airport, so planes, including F-15 fighter jets from the 142nd Fighter Wing of the Oregon Air National Guard take off and land day and night. The mighty Columbia River is 150 yards to my north and conveys all types river traffic, so fog horns are common. The Interstate 5 bridge is one of two bridges that cross the island. The other is a railroad bridge. Both are modified to open for boats and both bring their own unique noise. The interstate bridge carries over 140,000 vehicles every day and the railroad bridge sees about a dozen trains, including two crossings by Amtrak. All of these lead to a cacophony of noise that eventually fades into the background on any given day.
Not all the noises are man-made, in fact some of the most beautiful and haunting sounds I’ve ever heard have come from the many birds who nest here year round. There is also a protected area of wetlands just south of the island that are home to many thousands of birds. Canadian Geese flock in such numbers their honking can even be heard over the train whistles. One of my very favorite birds, the Osprey, nest right off shore atop the old pylons. Each morning during the spring and early summer I listen to their piercing calls as they hunt and teach their young to fly.
It is busy island, full of life’s hustle and bustle; so if it’s quiet you want, this probably isn’t the place. Having lived here 17 years, I have to say that I am quite content to call this piece of earth, my home.
I have spent months dithering about what I would blog. After several false starts and repeated bouts of angst, I’ve decided to simply write about whatever comes my way. Writing has always been healthy and productive outlet for me and now, in our digital world I can publish without worrying about pleasing some editor. Don’t get me wrong, I do hope that what I produce is worth reading and that it has value beyond just me.
While you’re here, if you should feel the need to leave a comment, be my guest. In turn if you have nothing to say then feel free to say nothing. Thanks, I’m hoping that you enjoy what you find here and that you will stop by again soon.
…That’s ~About Me~ for now!
Wading Barefoot 